Wednesday, December 31, 2014
A quick run through my memories, this year seem pretty mundane. All I can really remember is school and assignments, not-good-enough birthday celebrations for my friends, a lot of doing things and going places alone, meeting of old friends and (lots of) technologies failing on me. And the most amazing feat of all is reaching home at 3am after traveling all around Singapore (and not getting locked out). What an achievement.
What I have learned this year is that friends are friends. Nothing more, nothing less- don't expect them to act a certain way. If you need them they will be there for you, and if they are not, then...just let it be. I'm not saying this in a negative way. What I mean is that if they are true friends they'll be back in your life somehow, sometime; you'll still be able to act the same way as you always do with them even if time has passed. And I guess that in a way it's good? Because sometimes having to force communication with people that you think are close with you is rather pointless.
Don't expect people to treat you the way you treat them because... because duh life is unfair and everyone is different. It's never a balanced equation. I used to always hold on (really stubbornly) to the concept that friendships should be two balanced scale, and if it's not matched with my effort, I'll feel like it was my fault and that I am an inadequate friend or person- like I'm not enough for the other party to try to match up with mine. Now I feel like I know better. It's not me. It's them. And it's not them as in "it's their fault". It's just "they just don't feel the same way or think the same things".
Other than these.. I think I've done my best for school assignments too (except for presentations, let's not even go there). 2014 has been pretty heavy and negative in general. Started the year with continued hospital visits for my mum from 2013, ended the year with my grandma being sick with stomach flu, and so many other bad and unhappy things. I hope 2015 will be kinder to us. I don't feel ready because... graduation.
What I have learned this year is that friends are friends. Nothing more, nothing less- don't expect them to act a certain way. If you need them they will be there for you, and if they are not, then...just let it be. I'm not saying this in a negative way. What I mean is that if they are true friends they'll be back in your life somehow, sometime; you'll still be able to act the same way as you always do with them even if time has passed. And I guess that in a way it's good? Because sometimes having to force communication with people that you think are close with you is rather pointless.
Don't expect people to treat you the way you treat them because... because duh life is unfair and everyone is different. It's never a balanced equation. I used to always hold on (really stubbornly) to the concept that friendships should be two balanced scale, and if it's not matched with my effort, I'll feel like it was my fault and that I am an inadequate friend or person- like I'm not enough for the other party to try to match up with mine. Now I feel like I know better. It's not me. It's them. And it's not them as in "it's their fault". It's just "they just don't feel the same way or think the same things".
Other than these.. I think I've done my best for school assignments too (except for presentations, let's not even go there). 2014 has been pretty heavy and negative in general. Started the year with continued hospital visits for my mum from 2013, ended the year with my grandma being sick with stomach flu, and so many other bad and unhappy things. I hope 2015 will be kinder to us. I don't feel ready because... graduation.